I tell the story of Ramon a lot. He was one of my best friends, a member of my inner circle, someone who was a part of my brotherhood, who I did life with and would go to battle with and for without even thinking about it. He was a great man. His laughter and smile were infectious and he had an amazing ability to pull me out of the sky and back to reality focusing on the day to day – instead of the ten year plan. I’m so grateful for the time I had with Ramon.
This story, today, is not about Ramon. It is about Ramon and Allison; it is about their wedding day – the calm before the storm of cancer. It was a day of celebration when everything in the world seemed perfect. No one could have ever guessed what part of their love story was beginning.
Honestly, when I tell the story of Ramon – this is the part of the story I so often “Yada, yada, yada” (to quote Seinfeld).
There is a willingness to sit in the pain, sorrow, and desperation of the story, but I forget to celebrate what came first. As a man who stood in Ramon’s wedding, that pains me to admit. Why is it so much easier to talk about the pain and sorrow, not the celebration?
Maybe, talking about the moments of joy are a bittersweet reminder healing in this life did not come.
Their wedding celebration was small and intimate, inside his family’s backyard. It was filled with only the closest friends and family. I remember Ramon taking wedding photos in bare feet on the grass and wearing Rainbows; I also thinking he totally was going Miami Vice on us. Allison was late, because she got pulled over on the freeway for speeding around a cop car doing a Round Robin… She got out of a ticket because she didn’t know what one of those was and was in her wedding dress already. This story still brings a smile to my face today. I can only picture the scene.
Today would have been, is, their 5 year wedding anniversary. I miss my brother from another mother. Even though Ramon and Allison’s time on earth was short as husband and wife, I’m forever grateful my brother was able to spend 10 months married to the love of his life, and have 6 months together before cancer struck.
Happy Anniversary my friends.